To the kids that don’t think my son is good enough

I’m sure you didn’t mean anything mean by it. I’m sure you were just bored, and decided to go home, where you can run and act like kids. I get that, I do, BUT, when you leave a child sitting in his yard, without saying a word to him, simply because he is different, and maybe can’t keep up with you, and tries to get you to do things that he CAN do, it makes me angry.

Anger is a secondhand emotion. I get angry because you hurt my baby, and that hurts me. See, I know why I feel the way I feel, so it’s all good, I’m still sane, and in control. Now, when you have done this repeatedly, and I have run out of excuses that will take the hurt out of my baby’s eyes, you’ve gone beyond making me angry. You’ve pissed me off, and you really don’t want that. You see, I don’t raise  my children to treat others poorly. Sure, they do things sometimes, and I talk to them, ask them how they’d like it if the roles were reversed, and try to help them figure out how to fix their gaffe. That’s learning, and growing. I also teach them to defend each other, and themselves, and while people say sticks and stones, my children know that isn’t true.

Words and actions hurt far worse, with longer lasting effects, than a punch or kick ever will. You see, with every look you’ve given my son, every time you’ve ignored him, or told him an idea of his is stupid, or that something he has is not cool, or whatever, you have told him that he is LESS. He is less human, less worthy, less fun, less normal, just LESS. For a child who already has so many issues with socializing, and trying to be normal, when his brain and body weren’t made to fit into the box that society has deemed acceptable, these messages slowly break down his every sense of dignity and esteem that he feels. No matter how hard I try to lift him up, praise him, tell him how amazing he is, I am his mom, and we all know that moms all think their kids are amazing, and awesome, right?

He wants, no needs, the verification that he’s good enough from other kids, so for you to treat him like less than a dog, no matter how unintentionally you may have done it, it’s not okay. How would you feel if the roles were reversed? How much would you like having a body that struggles to do the most basic things, like walking, or running, or standing back up, not to mention all the other issues muscular dystrophy has blessed him with? How would you like having a brain that makes the things others say may no sense to you? For everyone’s words to jumble together, so that you can’t make sense of what is being said? How would you like being left behind when your brain and your body simply can’t keep up? How would you like it if the child being left behind were your baby in a few years? Not so much, right?

I’m sorry, I would love to give you another chance, but, you see, as I’ve explained, my son wears his heart on the outside, and you’ve already hurt it too many times for me to trust you with him again, so this is the end of the line for you. Sure, it sucks, but I won’t let the fact that there aren’t many kids in our neighborhood force me to allow you to hurt my children. I would much rather they keep the friends that they have, that treat them with respect and dignity, and see past the differences, than to allow one more tear to fall because of ignorance.

My hero, and his biggest defender

My hero, and his biggest defender

Sorry, I had to vent it this way, or else I might go confront some ignorant adults down the street, and figured there were plenty of people who have dealt with this themselves.

Please excuse this shameless plug

Okay, so life has been insane, and I promise to update on some of it soon,  but, for now, I have to make a horribly embarrassing request, and hope that this fledgling little blog doesn’t lose any followers, and that those who follow me have seen my posts about my son, and understand, possibly even sharing this….. I hope.

Asa has been ordered a power chair to get around when we are out and about now. He is still walking, and we want him to continue to walk as much and as long as possible, but the reality is, he gets tired very quickly, and has outgrown the stroller we bought to get him around in. This means that, for the last few months, aside from doctors appointments and trips to the grocery store, we stay home. We have started the process of getting his power chair (they usually start with a manual, but we live in a very hilly area, and he doesn’t have the upper body strength to propel a manual chair, and having someone push him defeats the purpose of having a chair. A wheelchair for non-ambulatory people is like legs for us walking folk. How would you like it if you could only go where someone took you? It would be very frustrating in no time, I’m sure)…..

Anyway, we have started the process of getting him a power chair, but our current vehicle is not only not equipped to carry the power chair around, it is old, and nearing the time to scrap it to get the most return on it (sad, but true, 250k+ miles on it and almost 20 years old) so we have started a couple of fundraisers to raise money to purchase a wheelchair accessible van.

The first one, here, is an online fundraising site, where you donate money, just for the joy of helping.

The second one, here, is for a tee shirt designed by another Facebook user, who has generously offered 60% of the proceeds towards helping us purchase a van.

I am not asking anyone to donate, or purchase anything. If you can, that is awesome, and I will do something, like dance to “Happy” (horribly, by the way, just so you know what to expect) or have Asa make a Thank You video and share it, to show how much we appreciate the support, but if you can’t help financially, I totally get it (I am, after all, so broke that I’m shamelessly begging strangers for money!) but ask that you share the links on anything you think may help, be it Facebook, Twitter, whatever you think may help. Also, if you have experience with fundraising, or any ideas that may help us, please feel free to comment. I am wide open to suggestions!

Thanks for the support, and I promise to keep you guys updated on Project Mobility (figured I should give it a cool name, maybe it’ll stick 😉 )